Storytime Episode 6: It’s All Fun & Games Until Someone Gets Hurt

We’ve always been competitive; it’s how Nick and I have always been. Anyone would gush at the fact we had the makings of a wonderful story. We were neighbors. Our parents, our moms, were best friends. They grew up together and pretty much did everything together. Anyone could consider them twins because of the bond they had. So of course, when they got married and were planning their futures, they wanted to make sure they were still in each other’s lives. That’s how they both moved in the same neighborhood and bought houses next to each other.

Nick was born two months before me. Once I came into the picture, our moms made sure we did everything together. So of course, to the world, we were meant to be. Destined to be soulmates. Meant to be lovers. Growing up though, I saw him as the brother I never wanted since I ended up being an only child. Nick had two other siblings. His younger sister, Penny who was two years younger than us, then his baby brother Michael. Michael is two years younger than Penny. Nick’s family really had a thing for twos, I guess.

As Nick and I got older, we hung out and did everything together. When I say everything, I mean everything, and it became anything past playdates in our backyards. We could go out with friends to the mall, arcades, or restaurants. Nick of course made sure to beat me to getting a driver’s license first. I really don’t know where our competitive spirit came from. I mean we played video games sure, but even during playdates we always tried to one up each other I noticed. He would prove he could carry more toys during clean up, so I made sure to do the same but better.

Life was just always like this.

Then the worst-case scenario happened.

It was homecoming, and we were seniors in high school. I never liked school dances and neither did Nick, so we always made sure to just hangout on the actual day. Of course, rumors spread that we liked each other, but we dismissed them. Senior year though, he ruined things by asking me out as his date. I told him he was nuts, and that he should ask someone else. In fact, I actually cried and smacked the flowers from his hands. He didn’t talk to me for weeks. Guess how many weeks? If you said two, good job.

If you’re asking if we did our tradition, we did, but it was somewhat awkward. Nick kept his distance, and I actually hated that. I punched his arm and told him he was dumb, but it was after then, he never asked me out.

As life would have it, we attended the same university. He and I both went to the University of Wisconsin-Madison. We both ended up taking Psychology so of course we competed for the best grades. College was normal I would say. It was like we were back to our usual selves, but after graduation, we didn’t talk. We were busy pursuing our careers most likely. It was like we had a mutual agreement that we were not to set foot in the other’s house or contact each other.

As time elapsed, I ended up becoming an IO Psychologist, and I heard Nick became a Clinical Psychologist. As working adults, we drifted. I know our moms were bummed about that, but one day, Nick came back and visited home.

He looked so different. I guess working in his profession can do that. I’m not sure if his hair was always on the darker brown side. I thought it was black. When he looked at me though, those blue eyes hadn’t changed. I couldn’t explain it, but my heart skipped a beat when he called my name. I didn’t understand this.

We played catch up. I told him I was with my parents, and they agreed I could stay with them as long as I wanted. He said he was living alone in Florida. I joked with him that he wouldn’t be alone too long since I’m sure he found a pretty Floridian. He didn’t like that much. He actually looked mad at me. The drive home was quiet, which is funny because our drives are usually him parking the car in their driveway and him walking me to the door.

It was then that Nick and I decided to play a stupid game. You know what they say. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. The idiot I was…I agreed. Nick basically relayed what happened in high school. He said he had feelings for me, and they mostly developed when we were sixteen. I laughed and told him I felt nothing, but I was willing to try it since I think I’m feeling something now. He didn’t seem mad. He liked my answer because he claimed his feelings for me never changed since then even after I rejected him.

The objective was simple. Be friends even though we had feelings. Test the waters. See what could become of us while he was here. So, we went out on I guess dates every evening. In the mornings and afternoons, we acted like we were little. Competing in every game and just one upping each other. Our moms were happy. I wonder if they had always hoped this for us.

Ten (business) days, or two weeks, flew by. Nick was leaving for the airport that evening. The sky got dark, and I thought maybe his flight would get cancelled since it began to rain. He said his goodbyes to our parents and to his siblings. Usually his mom was last, but this time, he asked me if I could go with him to his car.

“Dana,” he said.

Silence.

Rain drops poured harder and I wished I had at least a hoodie.

“What did you think?”

“I think I do have feelings, but I’m not sure about them. Nick, can we really be what you think?”

He finished loading the car.

Silence.

“I did…”

“A cliffhanger?” I asked. “Wait, you said ‘did’. You used past tense.”

“Dana, I will always love you, but after these two weeks, I noticed you really don’t feel a thing.”

“I just told you I know they exist. Deep down, I do feel something for you.”

“It’s not enough. I don’t think you will ever be sure,” he said.

“When you kept your distance after graduation, was it because you were mad at me?” I asked.

“No,” he said, “I could never be mad at you. However, this hurts a lot. I wish you didn’t do this.”

I didn’t mean to yell, but all of a sudden I said as loud as I could, “Do you think I wanted this? Do you think I wanted to feel? I don’t do this! I wanted us to just be how we were, but I am confused because I want something more with you!”

“Dana,” he said gently. It was very psychologist of him. “You cannot have it both ways. You have to choose. I have waited a long time for you. If we are a meant to be, it will be. But right now, maybe it is best we keep our distance.”

When he said that he gave a small smile and looked down at the ground. He then made his way slowly to the driver’s side.

“Nick,” I said.

Silence.

“I didn’t mean to yell. I am so confused,” I said walking to the driver’s side.

He was in there and rolled down the window.

“Nick, I want to be with you, but I wish you didn’t do this to me. Why? Why did we do this?”

He just looked at me. He actually looked sad and maybe tired.

“Dana, I don’t know what you want anymore, but I don’t regret loving you.”

The L word. He said the L word. I remember when we were little. It was my sixth birthday. Nick said he loved me. I told him never to use the L word because that word meant a big deal.

“You used the L word,” I said crying.

“I did. Didn’t I…Dana, at the end of the day, you will need to make a choice. Do you believe it’s me or someone else?”

“How am I supposed to know Nick?”

He nodded and looked straight ahead. Then he signed and looked at me.

“Do you think this time we were playing a game?” he asked me. He looked so serious.

I will always be an idiot because I wish I could go back in time and fix this moment.  I’m not sure why, but I nodded.

He looked like he was going to cry.

“Dana,” he said, “you…win.”

He rolled the window up. He was moving slowly to make sure I didn’t get hurt – like he always does – making sure I don’t get hurt.

As he drove out of sight, I realized the gravity of my actions.

I tried to call him as I walked back to my house. I forgot I was soaking wet.

He didn’t pick up. He probably needed space from me. No wonder he left for Florida. I called one more time because I hoped if I called in twos, I would be lucky.

No answer.

So, the third time, I left a voicemail because I knew texting wasn’t enough.

“Nick, please. Pick up. I am sorry. You are right. I’m confused. I know it’s no excuse. Please can we work this out? Can we fix this? Can we fix us?”

I hung up because I didn’t want him to hear me cry.

I didn’t know what else to say so by the time I got to my front door soaking wet all I could do was cry and cry before entering the house.

I felt mad at Nick for making me have feelings. I was mad we played this game, but the reality was, only I thought it was game.  I have learned the hard way that life is not a competition.

Saturday, May 2, 2026